01 August 2006

...now I'm only falling apart

I've tentatively come to the decision that suing my stepmom isn't going to resolve anything. What's gone is gone, and I can't get it back. Suing won't repair how she shattered my heart by being cold and uncaring, and my sister's assured me I'll get everything that's mine when the time comes that my stepmom passes. Nothing - nothing at all - is worth the chance that I would be unable to see my darling baby. As sad as it may be, this small child has become one of my main reasons for living, and not being able to see him regularly is unacceptable.

I'm not entirely sure what I'm going to do when the family moves to South Carolina, although there's been talk of moving in with Missy, providing they get a house with a FROG, and nannying. It's not my ideal job, but something I could do, and would enjoy, but it's something to think about.

Now I just have to figure how to get over the betrayal of my stepmom, who promised me she'd take care of me and my needs. I'm alone, truly alone, in this world now, with the quasi-exception of my sister, and I need to re-learn how to live, and deal with this, and know there's no one I can depend on. Daddy always taught me that the only people you can truly trust and depend on are your family. What he neglected to teach me was that the definition of family for this illustration rarely extends beyond blood ties. Part of me prays he is with us, watching all of this unfold, appalled by my stepmother's actions.

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